Wednesday, March 30, 2011

March 22, 2010

Some of thse who are closest to Nate and I know that we have been thinking about a baby for a while, but not knowing if having one was in the cards for us. I have always been a "lucky" girl when it came to that certain monthly visitor...who very rarely - if ever - seemed to come visit me! Never did I imagine that there would be days when all I wanted was to be "normal" in the girl department. :)

Anyway, when Nate and I started dating - and once we started being "serious" and the subject of kids came up....I always made it very clear that I wanted to be a mom more than anything, I would love to have kids of my own...but ALSO I ALWAYS wanted to adopt - at least one! I was so thankful to meet someone who was open to the idea - jackpot!

Nate and I never really worried about being able to have kids, but once nate said ... "I'm ready"...oh boy! I began to panic a little! I mean, dont get me wrong, I want to be a mom as much as I want to have a zoo in my backyard...maybe even more :) - but the thought of "trying" (which i HATE that expression) to have a baby scared the bejeez out of me!

Anyway, long story short, 9 months, 4 "ultrasounds" and a TON of dr visits later - we were told, "well....without a cycle it is very hard to determine if you will be able to get pregnant on your own...but here are your options..." Bla Bla Bla...I have to say, there are a TON of options out there for treatments, and I think that at this point in my life I truly feel like if God wants me to have a child of my own, he will provide one, IN HIS TIME.
In the mean time, we will just continue to grow closer together, have fun, take awesome trips, work on the house, spoil the dogs and dream of what our family will look like one day!
(**We have already been looking into adoption - internationally - and are VERY excited to be able to submit our paperwork **hopefully** in Jan 2012! )

Anyway, I say all that to say this....sometimes letting go of things we can't control, and I mean REALLY letting go, being okay with where we are right now, with what we have right now, and not worrying about tomorrow....allows God to surprise in the best ways....

I mean the best ways...

I mean like positive pregnancy test(s) ways....

Yes, about 3 weeks after my last Dr. appt where I was offered "options" to pursue - to see if we could have a child on our own.....a week after starting to feel "funny" and 3 tests later.....
we have a miracle. :)

Its so funny how the mixed emotions have been for us, sadness for girls I know who are still struggling with this, excitement to see what the baby will look like, scared-ness about this whole pregnancy thing/miscarraige/healthy baby, nervousness to tell people - how long should we wait...ect....but most of all complete shock and awe over the fact that the morning before I took the test, when I was feeling a little sad and discouraged, I read THIS is my quiet time...Jeremiah 1:19 -- "I am with you, and I will take care of you, says the Lord"

crazy. you would think by now - I would know this - but thankfully, the Lord knows I always need a little reminder - and he always gives it to me right when I need it!
Throughout the past several weeks of the nerves/scared/anxious feelings I have had - I have gone right back to this verse and know that no matter what happens - the Lord WILL take care of me!

So I guess this is our official announcement....We get to be parents. :)


Catching Up!

It has been since Christmas since I logged in. WOW! Alot has happened since then - basically we have started an entirely new life! This might sounds like an exaggeration - but to us it sure feels like it!
Nate and I both started new jobs on Feb. 21st! Nate was FINALLY promoted with UPS - after a long Long LOng LONg LONG time of waiting ...did I mention that it took forever? :) Either way, it just all goes to show that God's timing is never ours, and it is always better than anything we could plan on our own!

Nate and I talked over the Christmas about how my job at ACS was really beginning to take a toll on every part of our lives. The crazy long hours, the 24-7 access that some volunteers have to us (and by us, I mean ME, which is US when its the little bit of time WE are together -- you following?) ..and then there is the real issue with alot of internal issues that I will not go into - needless to say - when Nate is working nights and days, and I was working days and nights - we never spent any time together. And while ACS is a WONDERFUL organization, that I believe with all my heart does AMAZING things for cancer patients and families in the community- I knew that I couldn't work their forever when I started. And I am super sad to see my time there end, I made a TON of FRIENDS true FRIENDS that I know will be my friends for a very long time -- THAT makes leaving a little bit easier! :)

Anyway, I am working for Rogers Towers Law Firm downtown - (about 2 blocks from ACS) in their Document Processing Center. It's totally different, being in one spot all day and not in my car running from Southside to San Marco to Baldwin and then the Northside is a little wierd - but I am adjusting. :)

Nate is loving his new gig at UPS, he is an onroad supervisor in the North Center...which basically means a whole lotta nothin' to most short, he supervises/trains/enforces "stuff" with drivers that drive in the "north"...which from what I can tell means anywhere downtown, northside, fernandina, hillard, callahan....all the way to the GA border! :) He's happy, he is not working 2 part time jobs anymore, which means more time at home...which means I'm happy. :)

So that is us right now....happy happy happy. :)

Thats all I have to update for now, except we are working on and finishing up several projects around the hours, so maybe I will post about those when I have a little down time here in the office! :) Another perk to being in the office...down time...what is that you might ask....why I had no clue until I started here.... but apparently is comes with a side of no stress...which happens to be my favorite thing in life right now! :)